What makes you happy?

by - 5/02/2020 12:09:00 am

What makes you happy?

Well what is happiness?

It really does sound odd when people ask this question. It makes your brain think a lil bit harder to answer this question, because there is not right or wrong answer, it is indeed subjective.

When I was a kid, I really think that happiness is when you can get stuff that you want. Like a doll, bicycle, shoes, scooter, and other stuff that you really want as a kid. My parents somehow persuade me to study by promising a reward if I get the grade that they want. And also in Ramadhan, I have to fasting for 30 days if I want to get reward and many things that I really want. So, I studied and do my fasting as well. I try hard to get the grade in order to claim my reward.

I really think that I will be really happy when I get the reward, so I chase the happiness by that way. When I got the reward, I think that I was the happiest person on earth. I play with the reward for days until at some point I realize that my happiness is decreasing. I want other stuff, I want other reward. And always be like this.

Moving on to my teenege life, I thought that happiness was always with my family and having lots of friends. Until one day, one of my happiness gone. Yes, that is my father. I really felt down. I feel like I wanna isolating myself from everyone. But I realize, that my life is still so long. I have another happiness that can still be with me. Yes, that is my mother and my siblings. They become boosters when I feel down. I thank God. This is my forever happiness, but I want more.

Turning to university life, I feel proud because I get into the university that I want. I was happy for a moment. And then I chase another happiness and I thought, maybe I will be happy when I get a good paying job. Maybe I will be happy when I have my own money to buy stuff that I really want. It is never ending journey I guess. But then I realize...

I realize, I don't want to put my happiness on stuff or list or things that I sould get. I don't want a short term happiness and I want a longterm one. Then, I decided to stop for a moment and think deeply about what make me happy in a long period of time.

When I was really young, in kindergarten maybe, my family and I lived next door to some very good family. I always play with the neighbor's children at that time. Every month, my parents always give something like rice, eggs, noodles and other stuff for our neighbors. I was confused at the same time and had a question in my mind "why my parents bought this bunch of stuff?." And then when we gave that stuff my neighbor was so happy and sometimes crying. 

Well to be honest, I was so confused. I didn't understand why they are crying like that and why we gave them stuff. And then I asked my father those question. And my father smiled at me and said, "there is a portion of our money entitled to them, you will understand what that feel when you are older."

I remember that was not the last time my parents give stuffs for the nighbours from our house. And my father said to me "this is really make me happy when we can help people especially people in need in our circle. You will never be poor by helping people." I am kinda know what he mean but I don't really feel it yet. And now I know and feel what he really mean.

Now I realize that I am really happy when I can make a good difference in someone else life. When I can help someone in need. I have to admit I can not help everyone but I can help someone or few others. Not because they need my help but because I need to help them to make me happy.

Remember this, when you have a bad day. Try to find someone that is less fortunate than you and help them, you will witness pure happiness. You will reach a deeper understanding. And the most important part is you will feel the love.

You know what life is hard. Really hard. Sometimes it is hard to find happiness. And that's okay, you don't have to be happy all the time. You need those sadness too. But you have to find your happiness not in stuff but inside you.

Be happy always

xxx Dinna xxx

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